Divorces are unfortunate as they can be sad events and they often lead to a lot of anguish and upset. Within all of that, if there are children of two parents who are divorcing, then a lot of thought needs to happen as to how best to care for those children throughout and beyond the divorce.

Whilst there has been plenty written about how to care for children when both parents are present, you will not find as many words explaining how to be a good parent to children during your divorce. We cannot cover every angle, but here are some helpful tips from divorce lawyers which we hope any parent reading them will find useful.

Your Children Are Not Weapons To Be Used To Against Your Ex: Possibly the biggest mistake a parent can make during their divorce is to see their children as pawns in some kind of bizarre divorce chess match against their ex. That is simply not the case, and it is unforgivable to try to use your children as weapons against their other parent.

Do All You Can To Keep Your Children Shielded From The Conflict: Not all divorces descent into a virologic fight, but whether they do or not, for the sake of your children, you must try to shield them from the fallout. That means no insults about their other parent, for example, nor should your children have to listen to you shouting abuse down the phone at their mum or dad.

Try Not To Deviate Too Much From Your Children’s Usual Routines: There will be some adjustments made when just one parent is at home, rather than two, but wherever possible try to stick as much to the children’s usual routine. This includes after-school activities, regular trips to grandparents, or usual meetups with their friends all remaining in place throughout the divorce.

For Their Sake (And Everyone Else’s) Try To Keep Communicating Amicably With Your Ex: We cannot stress enough how much easier it will be on everyone, especially your children if your divorce is conducted amicably versus as an all-out war. It will cost less too, meaning you have more money to spend on them which we are sure they will be happy about.

Make Time To Have Fun With Your Children: Being a lone parent does impact upon what time you have available, however, we strongly urge you to use some of that time to have fun with your children. Whether it is playing games with them, watching movies together, or making a mess in the kitchen as you bake cakes, it will be rewarding for everyone.

 If Your Children Ask You Questions About Your Divorce, Be Open And Honest With Them: Some parents think that by refusing to talk about their divorce they are in some way protecting their children, but that is wrong. Children are inquisitive by nature and their parents divorcing must raise lots of questions for them. Help them by answering their questions when they ask them, as clearing doubts and confusion in their minds will benefit them.

Take Time Out For Yourself: Maybe not directly, but by taking a few hours to yourself to do the things you enjoy, even if that is relaxing and reading a book, then, by you being in a better frame of mind as a result, it will help your children’s mindset as they can see you are happy and content.